What happened is my perspective? Part 1..Exposure India

Just recently I went to India for an exposure trip with Yobel Market (www.yobelmarket.com) which is a non-profit organization in Colorado Springs, CO. I was exposed to many issues like the sex slave industry, extreme poverty, darkness of sin, the light of God shining through, Christians that love God and people, may other hard things to swallow and many encouraging things that are being done in the name of Jesus. I didn’t know what to expect when I got there so I went in with very limited expectations other than to see God work in the team and the people of India; and this is exactly what I saw and experienced.

I should say also that this was my first trip outside of the United States and a very challenging one at that. In the months previous to leaving for India I was trusting God to provide all my money so that I could go so for about 3 months I prayed and trusted God. For about 2 ½ months I only received half of what I needed but in the week previous to leaving God opened the door and brought the other half just 3 days before I was supposed to leave. I say this cause it is all part of God’s sovereign working in my life and the trip to India.

Since I’ve only been back for just over 48 hours my processing is in the very beginning stages but very necessary. I went in to this with the only expectations of God working in the team (collectively and individually) and in the people of India to which I will expound on in greater depth but for now I’m just starting out to get the bigger picture for me and you reading. This trip messed me up in a good way. While I was in Kolkata, India I saw many things that after thinking about the trip make me wonder about the poverty and darkness that is going on with pockets of God’s light shining through. And while in Darjeeling, India I saw a lot of the same darkness with more of God’s light shining through to the people of India.

I won’t touch on any specifics yet but some over view thoughts about the trip. While in Kolkata I saw young ladies stuck in the sex slavery industry that as we walked though the red light area gave me feeling like I never had but on the other side I saw a few non-profits working with ladies to help get them out of this industry though jobs and other means which was very necessary to round out the experience. While in Darjeeling I saw a community that seemed to be stuck in a routine that lead them to just get by (slavery of a different type) but then through the business training the team did I saw some people that wanted to change this very routine that was leading them in a circle of poverty.

Again this is short but just the start of the what I think will be a long process of God’s working in me, the team and the people of India over time. I am very hopeful for what is being done in India and am excited to be part of this in whatever way I am called to by my Lord Jesus. Blessing to you all as I am excited for you to journey with me in this process! 

Why Sabbath?!?!?!

I don’t know about you but I love to run. Yes, I said it – I love to run, but I have to say that running sucks at times. This is something I do about 3-5 times a week, all depending on what my week looks like and also depending on whether or not I have a race coming up. While doing some studying about recovery in running, I found something interesting about the human body – more specifically, the muscles. Proper rest and recovery is necessary to the performance of a runner, in fact, it is necessary for anyone who exercises. A human muscle gets stronger through rest of the muscle itself. When you work out, your muscles get micro-tears in them as they are stretched and released, but through the healing of these tears, the muscles grow stronger than before. Wow! What a lesson.

This stretching, releasing and resting is necessary in order for me to be as great a runner as I would like, but even more so as a Christian. I must also rest from the tears of life so that I might be as fresh as I can be as I follow Jesus the best I can. It is very interesting what Holy Scripture says about Sabbath and the need for it. It’s a subject and discipline that is not taken lightly by God, nor should it be by his people. Let me expound on what I mean by all this.

Jesus said, “Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath” (Mark 2:27). I don’t see this as optional, but mandatory for a holistic lifestyle, a strong faith and continual repentance within the finished work of Jesus our Lord. Let us take, for instance, the creation account that tells us when God finished His work He, “blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it He rested from all His work that He had done in creation” (Genesis 2:3). Yes, God finished his work and rested – the God who is able to create the world rested. I don’t see this as God having been tired, but see Him setting for us, His creation, an example to follow and to keep His work holy. Since the Genesis text was previous to the fall of man into disobedience, it then becomes a need for man to be complete through Sabbath as being in God’s image and likeness. We’ll revisit this last sentence in a minute.

I’d like to step back and look at two words from the Genesis text, and eventually we can look briefly at why Jesus says what he says about Sabbath in the gospels. Let us look at the words Sabbath and Holy. The Hebrew word for Sabbath means to cease or stop and the Hebrew word for holy means set-apart which gives us the denotation of separation from something and toward something. Not only are we to stop working, but we are to make a very definite separation from that work, for along with this we should be focusing forward in preparation. If we as Christians are redeemed, reconciled, a new creation, born again and all that scripture says we are, what does this separation from work look like within the people of God? What does this look like as a people on mission for God and His kingdom?

These questions are good and I believe necessary to truly live for God in the capacity to which we are called, but I want to close with some thoughts regarding two earlier statements I made. I said that running sucks – and there are days it does. Just as an example, this morning I told my friend who I run with, “…I just don’t want to run today, I’m not with it…” Today was a day in which running sucks, but I pushed though and actually had a great run and very good times in my run. The other statement was about Sabbath bringing us to the place of wholeness into the likeness and image for which we were created. To be a strong runner I MUST rest; otherwise, I will crash and burn, as I learned the hard way. The completion of who we are in God is an essential part of our faith as we become more like Christ our Lord (Romans 8:28-30) who often withdrew to be with the Father and made a regular practice of Sabbath. Jesus was on a mission to make disciples, but was still obedient to the call of Sabbath and time with the Father. I also see that Jesus was never in a rush to get going where he was going. He walked in his calling and the Father’s will. Hummmm???? Some food for thought!

Jesus was being intentional toward rest and separation – not due to a lack of love for people, but because he had an even greater love for the Father, obedience to His commands and the mission the Father sent Him on. This can be spoken of in greater length, but not today. Just think on these things as I have and look for another blog soon continuing this train of thought.

God’s grace, peace and love to you all!

being content in all things

"I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (Philippians 4:12-13)

Paul penned these words in prison, for being hated for the gospel of our Lord Jesus. I don't know about you but the worst that happened to me as far as persecution is that I got laughed, called stupid, and another time I was told I would be punched if I didn't shut up. To me these are minor compared to what Jesus or the apostles when through for the gospel. I say all this cause I don't see paul being this way at the beginning; he was seemingly more of a forceful and impatient man from what we see in the scriptures. Just check out his wording of his first letter to the Galatians (false teaching seemed to bring out his frustrations more then normal situations so I understand him being a little more straight forward then other situations) compared to his later writings; like 1 Corinthians compared to 2 Corinthians, 1 Timothy compared to 2 Timothy. There is also his dealing with Mark, in Acts 15:36-41 he wants nothing to do with him compared to 2 Timothy 4:11 where he asks for Mark to come to him.

All these show Paul in a way that is a little more content with God being in control and I would say his ability to love in ways that come only through personal experience. I had to teach for a moment to help my point that true contentment only comes through time and from the experiences of life as we walk with Jesus. About a week ago I was asked if I would be content with my life if I never entered vocational ministry or got married to a godly women (two things I personally desire). I won't go to deep into any deep personal reflections unless I see necessary, but that question got me thinking about me as a man and my walk with the Lord Jesus.

The question made me think in two ways; 1) about having just a regular 9-5 style job (not that this is a bad thing) and being a normal guy not "called" by God and 2) being alone for the rest of my life. First of all these are both wrong statements, but more so I was placing my contentment in ministry and a future wife; neither of which is promised! This is never a good thing for anyone, but for me I was looking for these to make me who I am/was. So it came down to my identity in these things that are not promised, worldly ideologies and not in who God is and what God has spoken over me in this life.

All that I knew and lived by was slowly being shaped by these two thoughts in my mind and not by the Holy Spirit and God's word. I would live by these desires and am in the past few weeks looking to God  shaping me and my life. I became addicted to what I wanted (marriage and ministry) and if it didn't seem to be going that way I would throw and adult temper tantrum towards God. In relation to my last post I was living bitter because I didn't get what I wanted. Living with a resentful attitude towards God and what he didn't give me was very unhealthy for me as a human but more so as a Christian.

I will end with a quote from the scriptures (Psalms 73:25-26)..."Whom have I in heaven but You? And earth besides you, I desire nothing on earth. My flesh and heart my fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever" and Henri Nouwen (The inner voice of Love; Pg. 24)....."Every time you do something that comes from your need for acceptance, affirmation or affection and every time you do something that makes these needs grow, you know that you are not with God. These needs will never be satisfied; these will only increase when you yield to them, but every time you do something for the glory of God, you will know God's peace in your heart and find rest there"

bitterness (this was not easy to write)

Soooo, yeah. Its been a while again since I wrote. I'm sure you weren't sitting on the edge of your seat or anything but here goes anyways.

I have been going through a new season of dealing with issues that have never been looked at or dealt with in a healthy way. Here's a little back ground with some disclosure or personal things. I've been on staff with a church in Colorado Springs for about 8 months now and about 2 months ago the lead Pastor noticed that I wasn't myself (his words). He said I was seeming like something was wrong. I agreed with him and we chatted for a couple hours and made some decisions about me and taking a sabbatical. Since I have been doing ministry for about 8 years without a break, for even while a student at Nyack college I was working as a young adult pastor, RA and started a student lead ministry on campus. Basically I never stopped going for the past 8 years. I never really had time to rest in God as the psalms say "Be still and know that I am God" (Psalms 40:10). I knew God theologically but never personally in the sense that I could pour out my heart to Him. This has slowly changed over the years but I got in the way and need to get out of Gods way and just show up as my Pastor said this morning.

All this said I had poured out my personal frustrations onto everyone around me, even and mostly those people that cared about me most. In the letter Paul wrote to the Ephesians he says "Let all bitterness.....be put away from you" (4:31). I was allowing all my years of bitterness towards my situations, life and family guide my direction and leading me into a habitual attitude towards people. My bitterness was being shown towards all people which was all because of lack of being content with God's direction for my life. I was struggling with trusting and being accepting of God's plan for me as His beloved child. I was living as though God never changed me, for this desire for more was running my life but not the Spirit of the living God.

Before I go any further I want to share a quote from Henri Nouwen in his book The Inner Voice of Love that I came across today while reading. It says, "You have to weep over your lost pains so that they can gradually leave you and that you can become free to live fully in the new place without melancholy or homesickness". This blog is part of my weeping process. This quote hit me like a ton of bricks, since I have been looking over weeping in a healthy way so that I can move past them into freedom. I love where Galatians 5:1 talks about Christ dying for our freedom and that because of this we should not be bound by the same sin he freed us from; WOW! I new light on a scripture I preached on in homiletics class in college, either that or I forgot; which I'm kinda good at doing.

No matter what the reason, God's word is living and active as is His Spirit. I am going through some things with my mentor that I hope and pray you who read this will join in with me so that I can walk in the freedom that Jesus longs to bring for me. I need to just daily walk by the Spirit and not in the chains that Jesus died to break. I have to say this is my most personal post but one that I needed to post so that I can move past this all. Thank you for your support of my growth in whatever way you help!